Cry me a Tiber

Okay, so that headline isn’t as clever as I would have liked it to have been, but I don’t have a lot of time today to sit around thinking up clever headlines for the all-important topic of KIDS CRYING IN CHURCH. In a Catholic Church. Which is run out of Rome. Where the Tiber river is.

Anyway, I think Dr. Greg Popcak first raised this issue in a blog post several days ago and since then the whole Catholic blogisphere has, according to Al Kresta, gone coo-coo for Cocoa Puffs about it. Should you bring your small kids to Church, should you let them cry, for how long, should you go to the cry room, etc.

My feelings on this are pretty simple: as long as I’m physically bigger than my children, I can control them fine without your help. If they start to get really noisy, I’ll take them out to the narthex. Actually, at one of the Churches we went to, years ago, there was this dark storeroom filled with creepy looking boxes and shadows and if the kids acted up, I’d tell them “Oh, well. Too bad. Now we have to go to the scary room!” and we’d hang out there for a bit in the dark in the quiet, with all those dusty boxes. Oh, how they hated the scary room.

And don’t get me started on cry rooms. Cry rooms are concentration camps for little children: a place to put the undesirables so the rest of the population doesn’t have to deal with them. If you tell me to put my kid in a cry room, I will junk punt you.

Anyway, the point is I’ve been doing this every week now for over 11 years and no one has ever scowled at me once.

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